SITTING ON THE OUTSIDE, LOOKING IN.......

She was beautiful, gorgeous....not exactly what I would consider to be “model beautiful”, no it was more than that – soft, attractive, tanzanite blue eyes.  Every man in the room could not help but stare and silently wish that she could be his.  I, myself could not help but stare and silently wish....silently wish that I could be as beautiful as her.

They were an amazing family.  Happy people.  Wherever they went you could hear shrieks of laughter.  Fun and love were always the order of the day.  Oh and let me not forget to mention that they were a wealthy family.  When I say wealthy, I mean “beeeeeg bucks”.  Influential people....and yet such amazingly, “nice” people.  I wish I could’ve been born into their family.

He was successful in business.  Mr Confidence who could close any deal.  I am quite certain that he could sell a sole-less pair of shoes for the price of a house.  If only I could do business that way.  If only I could be him.

Sitting on the outside looking in, these are the type of thoughts which have gone through my mind on so many occasions.  We all do that, don’t we??  Meet people and wish we could have their lives...their beauty, their love, their money......

But how many times have you hung around and watched their story unfold??  “Never judge a book by its’ cover” , we are told.  I prefer the saying about “assumptions”......”Assumptions are the mother of all (let’s be polite and say) muck ups”.   I can count on my hand how many sayings are really and truly appropriate, but this one, this one rings true and somehow manages to teach me a lesson every time.

You see, because she was so beautiful, she not only attracted the “yummy” men, she also attracted the scum bags and has lived a life filled with both sexual and physical abuse.  Her story is very, very sad.

The “happy” family who has everything, also has a child who is in and out of jail and causes them many heartaches and sleepless nights.

.....and Mr Confidence, well in business he has it all, but personally he has no love.  He has no relationship with his parents.  His closest family and friends are his business associates.  They care deeply for him, but let’s face it out of business hours they go back to their families and leave him on his own.

Just yesterday a friend and I were chatting about the story of laying down your cross.  If everyone laid down their cross – all their heartaches and problems – in one big pile, would you take someone else’s, or would you take back you own??

Everyone deserves a chance.  Everyone has good in them....and yes, everyone has bad in them.  I guess what I am really trying to say, the next time you are sitting on the outside looking in, don’t give assumptions a chance ......take the time to get to know someone and have compassion for whatever it is that they are going through.

How to Cope with Life

To quote an old cliché, “The only certain thing about life is death.”  How very depressing is that?  I do have to wonder what types of people sit and think about such things.  It’s enough to make anyone despondent, incessantly wondering what it’s all about and asking why we are here. 

Let me tell you something – we’re here because God put us here – for a purpose.  All of us.  He has a plan and purpose for us all.  There was no explosion that sent us flying to this earth, to simply cope with whatever comes our way, aimlessly struggling along until the day we will finally bite the dust and float back into oblivion – or whatever.  We were put on this earth for a reason, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy.   Having said that, we all have coping skills – God gave us those too!  It’s how we choose to use them that counts.  Life is all about choices – think about it.  We can choose to wallow in self-pity, we can choose to be co  Those are some of the negatives, but in my opinion, there are far more positives than negatives in life. 

mplainers, or we can choose to get angry.

A good coping mechanism is to write things down.  Divide a sheet of paper into two columns.  One column will be headed “Positives,” and the other “Negatives”.  Now list all the things you have to be grateful for and all the things which you consider to be problems.  As you go through the week, you can keep adding or taking away from your lists.  As each “problem” is solved, you should transfer it into the “Positive” column, by saying something like this:  “Today the person who owed me all that money paid it back in full.  Praise the Lord!”  What a positive that is!  Or:  “Today, after worrying about my health problems for so long, all the tests came back clear.”  Write down your blessings.  Thank God for the air that you breathe, for your job, for your family.  Or perhaps you lost your job?  Then thank Him for those who are helping you through your crisis.  Don’t focus on the problem because God is way, way bigger than anything the devil may deliver to your door step.  You’ll soon find that your “Positive” list will be much longer than your “Negative” one.

At some point almost everyone faces a major crisis in life, but coping with it isn’t difficult really.  It’s how you manage it that makes the difference.  Yes, it’s true, the only certain thing about life is death, but facing your challenges with hope is the surest way of dealing with them and when you’ve done that successfully, you will be on the list of people God put on this earth to help others.  

Author:

Léonie Edwards